The Erotic Mind

I've just started reading 'The Erotic Mind: Unlocking the Inner Sources of Sexual Passion and Fulfilment' by Jack Morin Ph.D.

I value its scientific perspective and I'm all for research into this field - sex has been pushed underground for over two thousand years and it's only in the last 4 decades that it's been given a public airing.

Erotic thoughts are interesting; because they're frequently unique to the individual - what turns one woman on will leave another indifferent.

Erotic thoughts or sexual fantasies often help me to achieve a more intense orgasm. I've also learnt the hard way that it can mean the difference between pleasure and chronic frustration. I used to find it hard to turn myself on; I wanted to masturbate but wasn't in the right frame of mind. Having experienced previous vexation would make me desperate to cum all the more the next time I tried. Yet I knew from previous experience that erotic thoughts helped me cum, therefore it seems silly now that I didn't return to something that I knew worked. However, having been taught as a child that sex was wrong and certain thoughts were evil, I think I was scared of my erotic thoughts.

From sharing the above, I can say that one of the most important things I've gleaned from this book so far is that we don't condemn people for their thoughts - as thoughts do not equate to action. So long as they remain purely figments of a person's imagination then no harm has been caused to herself or anyone else. I say this because sexual fantasies regularly foray into no-go land, such as rape, etc. Again, I reiterate; they're just thoughts. And here's where we need to make the distinction that it is FANTASY and therefore far-removed from reality. To use the above example, lots of women have fantasies about being raped, that does not mean they want to be raped in real-life. Of course they don't.

What about bringing them into physical reality? What happens between two (or more) CONSENTING ADULTS is their business. The words 'consenting' and 'adults' mean everything.

I'll write again on erotic fantasies when I've read more of the book. Until then, I'll leave you with this suggestion: If you've ever struggled to cum through masturbation and don't yet engage your brain first in sexual fantasies - then try erotic thoughts and find out what works for you and what doesn't. You may be pleasurably surprised!